Imprints and Impressions

At this moment, all I want is to taste the ultimate freedom. I wish to be freed of expectations,routines,goals,obligations,anything,everything.... I wish to lose my senses, to lose my way and never know it... Maybe, I already have, and never know it, who knows!

I wish... to care least about smiling back at those who might smile at me, to not turn back at the call of my name,to run wild with my eyes closed, and not bother the staring eyes or bumping into random strangers...to throw pebbles into the placid lake and watch the ripples form and fade, like sudden flashes of memory...

I wish... to let the strong burst of wind beat my face, blur my vision and ruffle my hair, without a care...I wish to love without fear, and to fear nothing but fear...I wish to pull out the painful mask of pretence, and begin to speak in a new accent, and sometimes, to stop speaking...I wish to feel the strong rain drops fall assertively on my open palms, and let them fall down weak, fluid, weary, like tears...

I wish... to look into the mirror, and not recognise what I see...to shatter the mirror and see the reflection unbroken...to open the door to my mind and let the world see within, and face it...to find a strange tree with a strange fruit, and bite into the fruit, without knowing its name, and having never seen it before...

I wish to walk all alone in an unknown street, aiming the horizon afar, chasing the desertedness, and following my own footsteps...I wish to be freed of hope, to stop hoping and KNOW for sure; or not know at all and still be free...to do all I like and be freed of guilt; to say what I like and never regret it... to never hold on to something, or hold back from anything...

I wish to hear the unheard, see the unseen and feel the unfelt- without fearing to know the truth...to fall in love with a pianist's hands and never see them again...to never run away from a swarm of bees or run after words of praise...to never crave for a shoulder to lean on...

I wish to be infused with sparks of enlightenment- to stand bold on a mountain peak and see the outspread wings of flying birds far below...to see the sunshine at the tip of a dew drop ready to fall...to see groups of pigeons fly in the backdrop of a stone monument as if on impulse...to behold the crescent moon adorn a starless sky...

I wish to smile and enjoy the feeling of small fish pecking at the feet dipped in the cold, pale green river...to wade bent, through a low grape vine and taste the lowest grape in a bunch straight from the vine...to get into a pond which rocks the full moon to sleep, and pluck a blue lotus...

I wish to fly at a great speed in my dreams, not knowing what makes me fly...and then turn back and find my own dreams chase me.